Moons and Stars
by Jayzsha
Summary: Little bits of talking between Tanjirou and Kanao in between of story arcs.
1. Chapter 1

_**This was originally posted on my ao3 but I decided to post it here so here you go!**_

_**Happy reading!**_

_**Takes place during Functional Recovery/Rehabilitation Training arc.**_

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_**I. Chains of Moon**_

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Kanao always find the moon a calming companion during night. It gives her solace that no one can give, and the isolation she was used to receive from others. It would never judge of her actions nor reprimand her for transgression, it was just there witnessing and seeing what she was doing.

It was just a looming silvery orb reflecting the light of the sun.

Observing the moon is her passing time every night. No one would disturb her in her solitude and she always preferred silence around her rather than robust noises whenever there was a gathering of people.

She always liked it this way. It gives her a peace of mind. Nothing to think, nothing to wonder.

Nothing.

But interruption is always a given. It's expected. Disturbance is part of life, for better or worse.

Just like the shadow that is slowly approaching her for example.

"Kanao? What are you looking outside?"

Kamado Tanjirou. She never expected it would be him.

"Ah, I see. The moon is quite beautiful tonight, isn't it?"

Beautiful? The moon? She looked up at the shining orb. To him, probably it is. But to her, it's just an object used to light the night. Just like the lamp use to illuminate the darkness.

She saw his shadow shifted as it sat beside her, joining her night viewing. She never moved an inch from her spot, not even turning her attention to him when he first appeared. Unmoving and still, with a pleasant smile on her face.

What was his purpose doing here? He shouldn't have any reason to sit beside her in this night. But still, she allowed him stay. It would be improper to push him away, and he never seemed to have malice nor intentions behind his actions other than to sit beside her silently.

"Did you know a story about the Chains of Moon?"

She blinked, slightly turning her head to him.

That action seem to be enough to continue his words. "The moon is forever chained in our world. Imprisoned and caged. The moon is scared at the sun that's why it ran away to the night. It always liked the darkness that's why the night was ideal to the moon."

Chained? Imprisoned? Scared? There was a story like that regarding about the moon?

"I'm sure it's not a real story. It's just a story used to tell my mother when we go to bed."

Jealousy. Jealousy would be an appropriate reaction to her regarding about the boy beside her. When she was young, she never had a family to take care of her. No, that's not accurate. She did have a family, just never a loving one. That's right, the reason she _would_ be jealous because of the lack of bedtime story. No one had told her a story about how the world works, let alone how to take care of herself to her bed.

But the idea of jealousy never resonated with her heart. It just beats steadily, the same goes with her breath.

"What about you? What do you like about the moon?"

Like? The moon? She never liked the moon to begin with, she just liked the silence the night brings and the moon just happened to be interesting thing to it. But, to give her opinion about the moon, it would be….

It would be…

…

She doesn't know.

She blinked. And stared. And then gave him a closed-eyed smile.

He blinked owlishly. Stared at her. And then gave her a _bright_ smile. "I see! You really like it very much!"

She didn't know how he got that idea but that is more than enough. But still, there's something…

Something…

Something about the chains and moon…

"You seem to be chained by something. Like a moon."

"Huh?" Tanjirou turned his head in surprise, a sudden voice came beside him.

Her eyes went wide and her smile dropped. _Oh no, oh no!_ The voices in the back of her head screamed in terror. She went against the order, the coin not used in her pocket still sitting. She tried to steady her breath, her heart loudly beating in her chest, in her ear, in her neck, _everything_ beats around her. She's gonna scolded, she gonna get punished…!

She gonna…!

_He will beat—!_

"Wow, you just talked! Amazing!"

…what?

"What do you mean I'm chained with something?"

…is she allowed to answer without the coin? She touched the coin in her pocket. Is she allowed when she already went against the order?

"Kanao?"

No, she will follow the order. Anymore transgression she'll commit must not be continue.

"Hmm? What's that?"

She positioned her hand, with her fist curled and the coin resting at the nail of her thumb. She flicked her thumb, the coin flipping in the air.

_Tails._ She gambled.

And then it landed. _Tails, it is._

"You always seemed to be chained because you lacked freedom."

"…Huh. I don't know the coin was about but I'm not chained because I lack freedom. I'm doing this for Nezuko."

…was she wrong in her assessment? No, she probably misunderstood something. Freedom is not really the right word. But what is it? What is word best described? That constricted yet independent action of his. That contradiction that he always exudes from his deed.

She can't find the right word. But the closest she can find is _self._

The boy beside her let out a ripping yawn. "It's starting to get late. Are you going back inside?"

She stared at him. Without her notice, involuntarily, her hand reached towards him and touched his face with the tips of her fingers.

He looked at her worriedly. "What's wrong?"

She smoothly retreated her hand, as if she had intended to touch him. She said simply with a smile, "It's late."

He nodded. "That's right. It's late."

"I'll stay."

"Huh?! You just said it's late."

"I'll stay."

"But—!"

"I'll stay."

He looks like he really wants to argue further but he sighed in defeat. "Fine. Don't stay _too_ late."

She latched her gaze on his back when he went back inside and opened the door. He paused at the door and turn his head to her with a smile. "Good night, Kanao!"

She was about to give him her usual smile but he already closed the door.

Greetings like that was not uncommon to her. Ever since she was taken by Master Shinobu's sister, Kanae, good nights and good mornings became a regular bases to her. Her former family may have given her grief that was engrained in her soul, the Kochou Sisters gave her an everlasting relief, something she was grateful for.

Especially Kanae's selflessness.

Selflessness…

…

Oh.

That was the word. Selfless. Kamado Tanjirou's Chains of Moon is Selflessness. No, Selflessness is not his Chains of Moon. It's Nezuko. And Tanjirou being the moon trapped in the chains.

The reason she involuntarily touched him because she reminds him of Kanae. The kind eyes and persistent attitude, she thought she was seeing her _sister_ from Tanjirou.

She just subconsciously projected her into Tanjirou.

No. Tanjirou is Tanjirou. Kanae is Kanae. She should not confused them with each other.

She looked up to the moon. Chains of Moon… if she's the chain, who is the moon? If she's the moon, who is the chain?

…

…

She doesn't know.


	2. Chapter 2

_**Takes place in the aftermath of Red Light District arc.**_

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_**II. Sea of Stars**_

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Tanjirou, at some point, heard of a story of a star that guides the road. Their shine twinkling without care, used as an object of compass while serving its purpose as a map. He never really see the point of using the stars because of the confusing swarm of stars that was spread above the night sky but it's probably just on him, not in his area of expertise.

But still, looking up at the stars above him, he can appreciate their usefulness, despite being used as an alternative guide for a lost map. He chuckled at the idea that came to him. If only he can tell that story to Nezuko and his younger siblings, they would be sure to like it, just for passing silence in the boring afternoon, in their life as simple coal burner in the mountains.

Their humble, modest life that was stolen and covered in blood in front of him.

…it wasn't the only story he eavesdropped from others during his mission, he also heard another story of the stars that symbolizes the souls of dead. The blinking light that represents the vestiges of their souls, always watching the living as they witness them. Not a single remorse nor sadness.

They were just there, twinkling as if without care.

If the story is true, is that the reason why he always heard the voices of his family that already passed on? Or was it just a reflection of his suffering that continues to cling on him?

The hidden desire for an impossible wish that any of this was not real?

"Tanjirou? What are you doing here outside?"

He turned his head to see Kanao approaching him, a scent of curiosity coming her.

"I can't sleep so I'm here for stargazing."

"…aren't you still recovering?"

Despite her face not expressing her emotion, fragrance of worry overcomes him. He smiled, seems like she listened to her heart now.

"I'm stretching my muscles instead being coped up in my room. It would feel… suffocating."

Kanao didn't respond to him, instead she saw him sat beside him and joined in his stargazing.

Their position to each other reminds him of their first conversation, seemingly in the same setting and the same time. He remembered their talks about a story of moon, the tale of Chains of Moon.

And her words echoed in his head about him the chained moon.

He wondered what those words supposed to mean, but he figured that she's probably confused with her words. No… he probably understood what she was trying to say. Him being the chained moon, as the story goes, he was trapped due to his compassion.

…that wasn't an accurate impression. The Chains of Moon is his opposite presentation. He is not the one being chased, _he's_ the one who chased. He lurks in the darkness not because it was ideal, it was just _convenient_ to him because of the demons who walks and crawls in the wake of dead night.

But still, he understands what she trying to say. The _lack of_ _freedom_ was his selflessness.

"What do you like about the stars?"

"Hmm?" He turned his head to see Kanao looking at him, with a slight smile on her face. During his recovery after the trial (he still haven't forgave that scarred face), the expression of her face feels a bit too natural making it looks out of place. It's like she was used to it, enduring as if hiding something.

But now it's different. She had loosen up and her scent was no longer complicated. Though it is confusing to read at times but that is more than enough. She had opened and listened to her heart.

Especially her eyes that expressed more than she realized.

"Nothing special. They're beautiful at night and I like it."

"…no reason?"

He softly chuckled. "Not all things you like has a reason. Sometimes… you like it and that's it."

"I see."

There was a pause between them before she spoke again.

"Do you… have stories about them?"

He blinked. "The stars?"

She nodded.

He had stories about them but… "They're really not that interesting. I don't think they are worth telling for."

"But Chains of Moon is not that interesting to begin with…"

That statement was an honest blow to him. He never expected that.

"Ah. I didn't mean it like that." Kanao looks flustered. "What I mean…um… no matter how boring they are, I'm always willing to listen!"

"It's okay. You don't have to make myself feel better." He held a hand, wincing as if he received a physical manifestation of her honesty.

"But…"

"It's okay, really."

He never expected a simple honesty would get him that much… But in his defense, he was never a good storyteller to begin with so he will take that criticism to further improve himself.

"You really are strong, Tanjirou."

Huh? How is that related to…

"Both mentally and physically, especially the wounds you received during your mission. And also, what happened at Natagumo Mountain… I'm sorry."

"?" What was she trying to say?

She blinked with fragrant of confusion. "You don't… know?"

"Know what?"

She stared at him with slight apprehensive look before she looked down to her lap. "No. Forget about it."

…did he miss something?

But the words she just said… "I am not really strong, Kanao. My sword keeps breaking under pressure, and I've failed those people whom I wanted protect…" He trailed off, remembering the faces of his family. "Rather than me, I think it's you who is stronger."

She shook her head. "I'm not."

"You are. I mean, you trained me during the recovery."

"I'm not. I only participated during that."

"But _you_ contributed during the training. Please don't underestimate yourself that I am stronger because _you_ are."

"But… compared to you…"

He shook his head. "Don't compare yourself. So what I am stronger than you or you are stronger than me? It doesn't change the fact _we _are strong. You are a 'Tsuguko', right?"

"That is because I was trained by a Pillar…"

"I was also trained by a former Pillar. It doesn't change a thing."

"…"

She stayed silent beside him as she looked down with a thoughtful look. He continued his words.

"I also think you are fit to be a leader, Kanao."

She gave him a startled look. "Me?"

"Yes."

"I'm… not."

"Don't—"

She shook her head. "You're wrong. I don't stand out among the crowd and I don't have that… magnet you possessed."

"…magnet?"

"People that are drawn to you. I know people doesn't like me because of what I am."

"Kanao…"

"Please…" She gave him a faint smile. "If you say that I am stronger than you, then let me return the favor by saying that you are a fitting leader than I am. The charisma and the kindness you have I lack… it is inevitable that people would follow you."

"I see…" He returned her smile. "Thank you, Kanao!"

She seems to be flustered at his smile as she looked down and nodded.

He returned his gaze back at the stars. Those words made him feel good, despite not knowing whether if he will be a good leader not, but that didn't matter. Compliments are supposed to be taken in goodwill, and he will never bring her expectation down.

And her words that she doesn't stand out in the crowd…

"Kanao." He started. "You may not be able to stand out in the crowd but the most important thing is that you are there."

He waited for her to bring her attention him. He pointed at the stars above him.

"You are among these sea of stars. Even though they look the same, they are unique to each other. Each to their own, they had their own life. Being in the crowd is not a bad thing. It just mean you are there. There, to be among them. There, to be with them. Don't be sad that you can't stand out among them. Be happy that you exist, be happy that you are alive. Be happy that _you_ are _you._"

She looked at him with wide eyes at those words. She smiled, her eyes glinting at the light of stars.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome!"

A gentle solace overcomes between them as they continue to gaze at the stars above them. A guiding star…the light of souls…no matter what these stars represents or symbolizes, he will always find them beautiful.

There is no need to look back at the past that already passed on, he can no longer go back nor return, there is only darkness that will greet him every time he closed his eyes. The scent of burning coal, the smile of his family… everything about it is already gone. He can't deny the reality and the gentle passing memory of them can always live on.

He would protect something that exist, that is alive.

Nezuko, Kanao, Zenitsu, Inosuke, anyone… he would protect something he can protect in his own strength, no matter how strong the opponents are. Even it hurts, even if it is painful, he has to move forward, he had to stand up for them.

Because there is always something to protect.

Because he had no choice but to live, no matter what.

_No matter what star you are, you will always shine the brightest in the sky, Tanjirou._

He smiled at the words of his mother.

_I will try my best, mother._

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**_I hope you enjoyed the story just as enjoyed writing this!_**


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